The best kind of wish is… one that you know will never come true, cos if you knew it was going to then you might as well stop wishing for it and just put it on a ‘to do’ list.
I am so sick of… personal ring tones. I’m tired of hearing 8 seconds of someone else’s favourite song.
My best relationship was… with a 63 year old asian woman who lived above me in Geelong in the mid 90s. We had this whole ‘reverse Lollita’ thing going. She enjoyed the company – I was in it for the food.
My most peculiar interest is… computer chairs. I so closely relate them to internet porn that I can’t help getting an erection everytime I see one.
I haven’t got time for… saying grace. Growing up we were taught to say grace everytime we ate, but nowadays who has the time? Besides, I’m not sure if Jesus wants me to pray before whisky and fruit loops…oh and see number 2.
For more on this comedian go to Fox K